Yo Nails? Where's your Xmas?

Hot topic on everyone' s lips, (HA!), has been my absence from the Internet. It's been a busy busy time, with busy busy things happening on the road. Gettin' it nailed down people, but that takes time, and time takes time.

More to come on that later. In the meantime, I have for you today a lovely medley of lunch time culinary delights. See, my girlfriend, being vegetarian, requires a much different diet than myself. Her nutritional needs are different, and getting those nailed down takes some doing, especially when you're on the road.

Today, I put together two of these darling little recipes, courtesy of "www.cooks.com" and "associated content's" lifestyle page, both modified by "yours truly." Heh. Merrily, Krampus. Merrily.

So, being that time of the time, I was putting together some Hummus. To start with, I wanted to put a little homemade tahini sauce together to make my hummus extra yummy. Unfortunately, I don't have an actual teaspoon, table spoon, or measuring cup. You wouldn't believe what a bugger of a time I've had finding such not in South Korea. I had a measuring cup, but it was made of weak glass, which shattered during an operation one night. Most sad.

So I used a shot glass. Lots of sturdy booze bessesls kicking around Korea, that's for sure.

Taking the basic homemade Tahini recipe,

1 T soybean oil
2 T water
1 T lime or lemon juice
1 clove garlic, minced
1 T oregano, chopped
1 T sesame seeds

I replaced T with


And carried on with the operation. Unfortunately it didn't quite work out, and I was forced to add two more shots of sesame seeds to the recipe to produce the thickness of Tahini I like.
Also, to even things out, I used three giant cloves of fresh garlic. Yup.

I like a thick tahini sauce. Kind of like a sesame seed peanut butter, only with a whack of zing on your tongue.

Completing this crucial stage, and winning a dubious yet curious look of approval from my Girlfriend, I continued, and produced this recipe:

1 lb. can garbanzo beans (chick peas)
Sm. clove garlic, mashed with
1/2 tsp. salt
3 tbsp. sesame tahini (three Korean standard sized soup spoonfuls in my case)
2 lemons, juice only,

substituting a normal can of chick peas for the pound can, a large clove for the small, a dash of salt instead of a bloody tsp of it, and lemon juice to flavour, which wasn't really necessary after the tahini was added, which was pretty lemony itself.

The end Product was mmmmmmed approvingly by the girlfriend, though it could used a little more lemon. I went back to my laboratory and doubled down on the hummus again, going light on the tahini, (two spoonfuls) and heavy on the blending.

The end result nailed it.

Good combo. I'm eager to try modifying this further with two things:

1. Roasted Eggplant. A Moroccan buffet I go to adds that to their hummus, and it's awesome. Gives it a smoky flavour. It's quite nice.

2. Fruit. but I'm not sure which fruit yet.

This made a great lunch, served with some toasted bread and cut broccoli as dippables and a vegetarian soup to round everything out. Filling, with lots of hummus and tahini leftover.

Adding raw vegetables to my diet has been one of the little things I've been working on for the last little while, which I hope to illuminate in a later post.

Rock on, and nail it down.

Tis the season... of death threats

... and it looks like the returning economy is not returning fast enough to stop the rising tide of racism in Korea.

If I get acid in the face, I promise to go Phantom of the Opera, and haunt Itaewon from the sewer drain closest to the old SlimeLight club. It really is the closest piece of class in Seoul comparable to the Paris Opera House. Or maybe I'll haunt SpyBar, still the bar of choice for Russian models.

http://briandeutsch.blogspot.com/2009/11/death-threat-against-atek-president.html

I'm going to bugger about with the settings

I'm going to bugger about with the settings, just to see what happens. I'm in an adventurous frame of mind, for reasons which you'll see, sooner or later.

Hmm. Interesting. Changes saved, ads added, or soon to be added. I wonder what will pop up.

User interest on this page is far from "up there" with the money makers. I'm more interested in what comes up as a Google directed Ad. Given some of the things that I've written about, some of the words that I pop in here from time to time, I think some very interesting things will appear.

There are some changes coming, my friends. Some big ones. I've got some personal stuff going on, and I'll get into that in due time, once I've got some complete stories to tell. Probably Wednesday, so if you're one of the four usual visitors to this space, drop in in the middle of the week, Wednesday night my time. I should have a tale for you. I hope, damn I hope it's just a cautionary tale. Wednesday. Big blog post, or poop strikes fan.

Tune.
In.
Wednesday.

Loyal Reader.

Heh. Loyal Reader. Unlike the "Devout" followers on Twitter. The language inference on that site still weirds me out. It's bizarre to receive an email every so often that says, "so and so is now following you ... on Twitter!" Temple of doom, website of ridiculousness. Although, I do love the story I read on the Huffington Post about the waiter who lost his job for twittering about the Hollywoof, (spelling intentional), star who ran out and didn't pay.

Not the best time to be losing your job. Not the best time to lose your job for publicly stating your opinion. Freedom of speech, shot dead, age two hundred and some odd and no one gives a damn because a rich actress who's going to lose her own job once she turns 38 (at best) took offense to being publicly lambasted for behaving like, well, a criminal. A petty criminal.

Sh*ts and G*ggl*s. I wonder what the Adsense program will think of that. Heh.

Here's the best news of the year for you though. All that hullabaloo about never getting the promised toys of the future is about to come true. Here, courtesy of the BBC is the nuclear battery.

It's the size of a dime. It lasts longer. How much longer? Well, the BBC tells us that, "Nuclear batteries are an attractive proposition for many applications because the isotopes that power them can provide a useful amount of current for phenomenally long times - up to hundreds of years or more."

Hundreds of years or more. What's that mean to us? Watches that never stop. Ipods that never need to be recharged. Hand held communications gear, Internet gear, field equipment, flash lights, hand drill, portable power saw, or electric based toy, tool, or trick, is going to last much, much longer.

Uranium, which you can check out Here:

the basic wiki for this metal

the wiki for mining this metal

some more information, and some kickin' pics of what we're talking about.

Think about, make sure you understand what's going to happen, and where. If radioactive isotopes are going to take over as the new portable power source, then uranium, our favourite reactor fuel, is going to be an even, "hotter", power source than ever. Who's got it, who mines it, who processes it, and who's selling it, will be the big questions for the mid to latter 21st C.

Power, baby. It's all about power. The power to do, the power to create. Of course, if you whipped up your own hand crank generator, you really don't need to worry about these things, do you?

Blast from the past!

Here's a few September posts from 2005 From that other blog which did not stand the test of time.

Interesting to look back.

Friday, September 30, 2005

Return of Pain Ray-- microwave update

Some of you out there will remember earlier rants and reports about the development of a mobile microwave projector that the US has been toying with over the last several years. This article is the latest I've seen on it's expected deployment. For those uninitiated to the freedom created by this marvel, read carefully! Mounted on the back of a truck, or the underside of a helicopter, the pain ray works by bombarding people with low intensity microwaves. Not enough to cook your innards, but enough to boil the water present in your skin. While, supposedly, not yet tested in real life situations, the least this freedom wave will do is make you feel like every inch of your skin is on fire, upon such feeling you will most likely drop to the ground and do the freedom twitch until it is switched off. At the most, it'll cause the water in your skin to boil and burst, leaving you with numerous bloody, freedom stains all over your heretical, non-christian clothing.

The sooner this gets into the field, the sooner we can start transmitting freedom directly into the flesh, rather than taking that cumbersome route around through the ears and around the brain.
Unfortunately the link that this was connected has been taken down at Defense News dot Com http://www.defensenews.com/index.php A shame. Defense news cot com is a fine website. Lots of neat little articles. see also

the wiki for this machine, please note the contracts given

this one from 2008 which discusses the expanding interest

and this one from February 2009 discussing the miniaturization

ah pain ray. I can't wait for you to infringe my civil rights, beneath my skin.

today's awesomeness

Sometimes absolutely nothing happens in a day. Then you have days like today.

A different Jackass giving you the death stare every ten minutes, old people throwing fits on the subway because you've got a different skin colour. Wading through a city built with arrogance and stupidity.

And then gems like these pop up:

"Giant Man eating birds from New Zealand!" Only extinct for about five centuries, the existence of these winged bloodthirsty marvels of nature give flight to my imagination, and should compel you to wonder about what else may be lurking in places where men fear to tread.

"Quantum computing takes another bold leap forward." As we forge forward into the quantum world, pushing our technology into a state where we can store data with light, we move ever closer to a ... well ... imagine a world where you didn't have to wait for your machines to catch up to you. Imagine a world where all human knowledge could be stored on a device that fit comfortably on your wrist. Imagine a world defined only by the boundaries of your imagination.......

"Also in the world of quantum computing." Teleportation is and always shall be damn cool. That we're on the edge of that beast, that we might be able to soon pop things in and out wherever we choose? Tele - F@#&ing - portation. Shit yeah.

"I"m not shitting you with a bunch of baloney." We're much further along than you might think.

"Saturn has thunderstorms that can last for eight months." There isn't much cooler than that. Check out the images, then remember how damn large that planet is. Rockin.

"some people can actually see time" because of the way that their brain is wired. What else could be perceived if there were more connections?

Sky's the limit people, once you get that foundation laid down.

Douche!

"This guy." is a total douche bag.

Two Steps forward, three back and one to the left before you bend over.....

"I'd always been fascinated by totalitarianism, so it was kind of like viewing a train wreck in action." is a quote from a great article on North Korea's secret economy via CNN.

A very, very interesting read.

One would call the topic a must, if you want to understand what's going on in North East Asia.

Also, check out: This community blog researching NK's secret markets via google earth.


The National Bureau of Asian Research has several nice articles regarding Nk's future.

I love Vixens

VIXENS!

I've always had a soft spot for Vixens.

I so hate seeing stories like this before my vacation.

I can only hope that if something bad happens, I end up with Shelley on a Pacific Island in a lost scenario.

Or somewhere in Russia. Which would be so Rockin'!!!

the Old new Me

I shaved my chin for the first time in three or four years yesterday. Wanted the girlfriend to see what I looked like cleanly shaven. She's never seen me like this before.

She didn't like it at all.

I'm happy to report that I still look like I'm Fourteen (14) years old without my beard. Terrible. And I've caught a summer cold, which sux.....

This is your moon!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EkHuRRDshhg

This is your moon as seen by the Japanese Kaguya satellite. It's a little slow, but the "earth-rise" is pretty sweet, so hang in there.

There is so much beauty for us to see with our own eyes, and so many marvels to uplift the mind of all humanity, if only we'd get our society in gear.

This satellite was crashed into the surface of the Moon this week.This is the final pics from a satellite crashing into the moon.

Notice the textures of the surface. How dare authorities say it's too expensive to go back to the moon. It will cost our species far more to stay here.

Mujst Read Articles of the week!!!

What's going on in Korea????? That's the number one question I've been emailed this week. While I'm preparing a nice wrap up for you, well

This is what's going on in Korea!!!!!! Right now!!!!!

HERE HERE HERE HERE! Hooray for Korean Justice! They've ruled that if a woman is beaten by her husband, she's libel for millions of dollars if she was a model or spokesperson.

(HT to Brian in Jeolla Nam-do, this man busts it out old school style!)
WTF!!!!>!@>!>!@>!@>!@>!>!

HERE HERE HERE HERE YAY! Racism in the press. Always good to see.

(HT to Koreabeat, one of the best blogs in / about Korea)

Svine Flux Update!

Some 50 (fifty) American citizens are being held (more or less with their [uninformed] consent), in quarantine in a hotel south of Seoul.

There were in a week long training seminar, about to launch careers as private school (hogwon) teachers, when disaster befell them.

One of their teachers was the Devil himself.

No, just joking, Satan is fine and at home, there's no need to worry about him.

One of these American teachers had contracted AH1N1, aka Dreaded Suckling Pig Flu, somewhere in his or her travels.. Acting with Keystone Cop lightning reflexes, Korean Ministry of health officials rounded up all the Americans from that hotel, and quarantined them in another hotel in a suburb of Seoul. Luckily, they grabbed one right after he'd been riding on the subway. That's just awesome.

And thus began their saga of thermometer probs and crappy meals, which you can read about HERE HERE HERE HERE YAY!


In related news, we have reports of recent British people arriving in Korea having their temperatures taken as they disembark. So if you're coming in and out of Korea this summer, try to keep your cool, or suffer an extra ten days of vacation courtesy Korea health.

Bold New Dirty Deed

THIS is what you can expect from dynamic young nations like Korea, and crazy film directors like Francis Ford Coppola, always out there searching for new ways to, well, get plastered.

Wine in a can. Guuuuuuhhhhhh. If, as Rock-philosopher-Gods AC/DC postulate, dirty deeds are indeed done Dirt Cheap, then surely wine in a can is not only the cheapest, but the dirtiest I've seen, in a long long time.

You can't drink wine from a can. It doesn't matter what you line the can with, if it's not in a glass, then the bouquet will not rise from the liquid and all you're left with is boozy grape juice.

Wine in a box was bad enough, but in a can? Jesus people. Anyways, read the article. Enjoy

Korea! Better than Real!

THIS explains so much of life in Korea.

Big thanks to Brian in Jeolla Nam Do not only for the post, but years of posts.

On a quasi related topic, after years of seeing Pro - Korea slogans like, "Korea Sparkling", "Korea, hub of Asia", and "Bravo your life", I've finally come up with my own:

Korea! Better than Real!

Mike White (R.I.P. little dude), revisted

Mike's mom Stephane continues her battle against the powers that be with absolutely no help from her government.

I'm not going to go into details, but only because it's late, and I'm going to bed, but take note, possible and current travelers, if you are an expat, expect absolutely nothing from your government if you get into ANY trouble.

Unless you are rich.

And I mean Batman rich.

Read here

then here

big thanks to Rokdrop for keeping the files that point the way.

build your own tricorder? Hell Yes!

Yup. Just found an article where Eric Paulos, an assistant professor at Carnegie Mellon’s Human-Computer Interaction Institute, is pushing the boundaries of cell phones.

His ideas include adding sensors to your cell phones to sample air quality and uv exposure, among other things. The first hurdle to overcome with this idea is that cell phones spend most of their time in pockets and bags. Personally, I think the first "sensor" that needs to be created is a simple solar based plug in charger. This would get that phone out into the open, where such sensors can then take the time needed to investigate the users physical environment. The big question they're raising is how is this going to change how people move through the world. I think that once people get used to the idea that they can discover more information regarding the world they move through, they're going to become addicted to it. Knowledge is power, yes, but it's also like a heroin - steroid cocktail, addictive and empowering. Once you have a tool that tells you things, you just won't be able to stop using it.

Think about all the tiny questions you are not allowed to answer in the course of the day: is the air conditioning in this building smelly, or is it just me? How much asbestos did they use in this old building? What exactly is in the air here? Is this place a safe environment for my kids? Why does this water fountain taste strange? If this was cleaned recently, how clean is it really?

I live in Seoul, one of the biggest, dirtiest cities in the world. However, I'm also one seriously curious ape by nature. Even out in the wilderness, a place I don't get to go to very often anymore, I would still like to know what's been going on in that environment since my last visit. Has the water changed? What's this soil composition?

I wholeheartedly support this idea. There will be resistance, absolutely, because there are people who prefer, insist, need to remain willfully ignorant. Dealing with hard facts on ground level environmental conditions is positively going to gross some people out. Imagine how you're going to feel if you are standing on the street watching your cell phone air quality meter when a diesel bus drives by, and for the first time in your life you can see what you've been breathing in every time one of those beasts drove by. How good is the ventilation in your school? Is that fog, or a dust storm?

Yeah, scary, might make you want to stay home, or wear a mask outside, or call up your representative in government and complain. It might make you want to stop driving your SUV down the street. It might make you start thinking seriously about the way we live, and that the faster we change certain things in our lives, the better it's going to be for everyone.

Even better on this idea, is the fact that it's not mainstream yet. Manufacturers are not interested, until the tech has been vetted over a few generations. This is very, very good for you my friends who have had the skill and strength to read this far. Why is this good? Well, once big companies get involved, they're going to select a small group of sensors that THEY think will be the most interesting to people. This selection process will be affected by powerful people who don't want you to be able to access information which may influence your opinion. However, the base tech for this is already out there, and genies are notoriously hard to put back in the bottle.

Yeah, I know, you're thinking, "Crap 'Nails, I don't know nuthin' bout puttin' no technology together." Really? Ever put lego together? Yes? Then you're ready for this. The only difference is that the pieces are more expensive and you might have to use a soldering iron. Your parents and teachers will help you, if you have the cajoles to ask, and the shutzpa to ask a hundred times.

I dare you.

ha!

Anniversary Riots in Seoul

Last year at this time there were a series of mass movements in downtown Seoul as over a million morons believed media lies about mad cow disease hiding in American beef, and how the current government wanted to poison all good Korean people with it.

I'm not going to write about that. There's been so much blogging about it, if you really want to find out, google it. I was here for it, and it was so mind numbingly stupid I still feel head pain from it. It hurt my brain to see so many people herding themselves neck deep in stupidity. Irrational, thoughtless, ridiculous, irresponsible, moronic. Millions of people ready to take to the streets without checking a single fact, believing everything they see on the idiot box.

1984 gone horribly, horribly wrong for the government. If anything, it proves that for 1984 to actually happen, you need really, really competent people running all the facets behind the scenes. They just don't have that here.

I am going to link you to video of this year's anniversary protest of the anti-beef protests.

needless to say, last year's protests killed the last chance for the KorUS-FTA to pass.

Just so you know, while literally hundreds of Korean products, from vehicles and parts and plastic bits and lcd monitors and so on, are sold in Canada, the only Canadian product I've ever seen here is some of the worst, cheapest maple syrup out of Quebec I've ever tasted. Canadian beef is still banned, as it has been since 2002 (?) when a case of mad cow was detected. Blackberry phones are forbidden here, because of protectionist economics.

Right now the Canadian Government is trying to broker a free trade deal here.

Not a month goes by that Canadians living here aren't demonized as drug crazed, lazy, AIDS carrying child molesters who are here to despoil the women and steal money from good Korean people, as well as spread AIDs, molest children, do / deal drugs, AND be lazy at the same time, a great burden upon the good natured, peace loving, jolly Korean people.

Right now the Canadian Government is trying to broker a free trade deal here.

Canadian citizens came here fifty years ago to fight and die for the freedom of these people. That's already been forgotten. As the elder generation passes on, they leave behind children and grand children who believe that the Americans at best came here to prop up dictators, and at worst invaded their country.

Right now the Canadian Government is trying to broker a free trade deal here.

Why? There's better quality and better deals out there.

Cloaking device activated

This is one great article detailing the latest in cloaking devices.

Man, just think of how that's going to change things.....

And in South Korean Photos

Good ol' Brian Deutsch of Brian in Jolla nam do posts up a great gallery of this weekends Anti-America rally in Seoul, as it intersected with the opening ceremonies of the HiSeoul Festival. Scroll down on Brian's page for some great pics, links to more pics, and some video of what it's like to be in a Korean Riot.

I love the pic of the babies lined up in their buggy's in front of the riot cops. That's so awesome, I think part of my skull is weeping. In joy, for the patriotism of those kids. That one's from the Anti-American beef riots in the summer. I can't wait for the Anti-Swine flu riots to break out next.

Bozo's.

Absolute Must See!!!!

You have to check this out. Hat tip to http://Koreabeat.com who hat tips East Wind up Chronicle for the link.

ala KoreaBeat:

"Photographer Toman van Houtryve posed as a businessman interested in investing in a North Korean chocolate factory in order to photograph the Stalinist country, and despite constant surveillance brought back photos so stunningly diverse and well-composed that if he hadn’t done similar projects before I would think the whole gallery was a hoax.

Hat tip to the East Wind-up Chronicle."

Here's
the link

The slide show is cool, but make sure you go through them one at a time to read the descriptions. If you only see one, check out
this poster

Some of these shots are startling beautiful. All are filled with absolute sadness. A must view.

Three Thumbs Up!

I've got three thumbs up for these folks and their actions to provide music free of charge for people who want to put music on their youdube videos.

There's some groovy stuff, but you have to hunt for it. It's also interesting to see what some people consider "rock" here in the closing down of the first decade of the 21st Century.

Regardless, the Gods of Rock smile favorably upon sharing Rock, and I'm sure extremely memorable sex has been granted unto said artists, and if not, then it's probably on its way.


Rock On!

Update! While searching through the ranks, found this band from Quebec: called "top johnny"

They've got a classic early 80's glam rock vibe, some catchy lyrics which I couldn't quite hear from the other room, (thus, making it perfect glam rock), and the one song that sounded perfect for a little Kung Fu video my lady's working on rocked so hard, that it continued over three songs! Yeah! Now that's rock! Ok, just slightly kidding about that last bit.

Top Johnny mixes some serious glam rock guitar with synth and some weird sounds here and there. There's nothing really seriously artistic about their music, but Top Johnny certainly embodies the "Rock Out with your Cock Out" ethos. It's kind of like listening to Bon Jovi, before he learned to care about more than his hair. I say right on listening for those nights when you're having a field party with a bunch of douche bags you don't really like, but can't hold their liquor so you're guaranteed some free beer.

"Who makes a song called "Glucose" for chrits sakes?"
"An Indie band!"

Update 2! Honourable mention:

Black Robes!

these dolts just don't rock at all.

"Who makes a song called "Glucose" for chrits sakes?"
"An Indie band!"

Worth Reading!

This article in the NY Times is well worth reading. It's short, but it details a bold new way of thinking about how we connect bits inside our machines.

This more, shall we say, flexible, way of connecting electronics opens up a whole new way of tailoring the physical manifestations of our personal technology, if you allow it.

I remember, some years ago, as nano-technology was taking its first steps. Pundits and prophets heralded the dawn of the nano age, and were expecting that in their lifetimes there would be nano mini factories that could sit on your desk and produce what you needed at the click of a button, if you had the base materials to build and the power to run it.

Sure, pencils, paper, such not, that is conceivable. A mini-factory could store the basic design, stack the carbon bits and solder molecules together, but what about a cell phone? Or a speaker? Or a laser pointer? Complex electronics would certainly take ages for a nano-factory to produce, building and placing chips and circuit boards, wires, casings, gah! Wouldn't it be simpler to just go out and buy one?

Maybe. Maybe not. Read the article linked to above. "Silver ooze", they call it, and take a second to dream of the possibilities. If the innards of an electronic device become liquid, well then.... instead of worrying about running connectors and wires, solder and snap in components, well... hmmmm.

Food for thought.....

Awesome!

That's one large group of people.

choice headlines of the week

What's been making news in your world? Here are some choice weekend cuts for you:

and here British scientists have developed a stem cell cure for the most common form of blindness. Surgeons predict that within six or seven years it will be a one hour procedure.

HOLY $(@Q#)(#*&)#@(&*#!!!! This is a cure for the degeneration of your eyes. That's absolutely awesome, and absolutely terrifying. This is not the cusp of that future we've always wondered about, this is the beginning of that downward slope into a new age. Where it will take us, and how far, are truly scary questions when it comes down to it. We've pondered this moment in our fiction, our science fiction, our comic books, our dreams. It's one thing to dream elaborate fears of future things when your hands are empty, it's quite another when the first tools start to appear in those hands.

Are you responsible enough to make sure we do the right thing?


Parts of America are going batshit crazy. (batshit crazy has been my catchphrase of the month). These are some crazy, funny antics, like this answer to the Obama administration's campaign of change: ""I'll keep my faith, my guns and my money, and you can keep your change!". the entire article is full of gems like this. Enjoy. (photo courtesy of the Huffington Post)



Jackie Chan weighs in on freedom in China. I think sitting down and talking to him for a few hours about this subject would be fantastic. His point of view, the life he's lived, the things he's seen, would be spectacular.



And my final selection today goes to Kim Jong Il for threatening a war he can't win. In what will be viewed as an ultimate tantrum, (but will probably end up being just another move in his crazy-ass chess game aux global politics), Kim Jong Il is kickin' it up a notch. However, it's pretty damn droll. Strangely enough, front page of the best paper in Korea ran this story about beefing up the robotics industry here. What the article fails to mention is the military robots that South Korea commissioned five or six years ago. It's never boring.

Oh, and although I can't find the link anymore, the following picture was in a Korean newspaper in response to the people of Madagascar overthrowing their government and subsequently throwing Samsung out of its colonial bid to develop a huge amount of their land for soy. The Korean papers, as you can tell from the cartoon, had some truly moronic things to say.

Korea Night

It's 10:55 pm in Korea, Sunday night. You're about to go to bed. The phone rings, it's your boss. He's plastered. Completely. He wants you to speak English to his rich brother, the CEO, who is afraid of speaking to Foreigners.

Problem is, brother rick CEO is also completely plastered.

It's Sunday night, in Korea.

Many times I've been told by Koreans, "When in Rome, do as the Romans."

If I'd followed that adage, my liver would have burst out of my chest years ago and killed them all.

Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn, is this funny

Courtesy of the Huffington Post, Sasha Baron Cohen's "Bruno" trailer:

click here



Damn, he is truly one of, if not THE, funniest (*^(^&*%(^%^&$%%$%$^%%$%$%$'s on the planet.

First time I watched this, I had to pee, I was laughing that hard.

twitter

I just signed up for twitter.

It looks like absolute and total crap.

I'll give it a try anyways. My id is RoadNails.

If you care.

Quote of the day

"There is a limit to the legitimate interference of collective opinion with individual independence; and to find that limit, and maintain it against encroachment, is as indispensable to a good condition of human affairs, as protection against political despotism"

John Stuart Mill
On Liberty

He may predate Rock n' Roll, but this guy rocked out hard for your liberty. If he lived in the modern age, I believe he would be hardcore into Ska-Punk, or perhaps skate/thrash metal.

Rock on JSM, you are remembered.

Yongsan Battle ground

My buddy just got jumped in Yongsan by two or three guys in Yongsan market, (the mega - giant electronic's market in Seoul, for those how don't know their Korean shopping districts), in the middle of the day, (1:00pm), on a crowded street. He was standing, waiting for the bus, when a Korean dude, standing nearby with his lady, started mouthing off, "Weigookin Kae sekia, Kai sekia", which translates loosely, (for those of you who don't know your Korean language), as foreigner c**ksucker, or foriegner son of a bitch, depending on your inflection. Just as certain uses of the F word in English can be considered the strongest of expletives, Kae Sekia, a derivitave of Shi-Bal Kaesekia, is the same in Korean. (In fact, eight years ago, this was the second phrase I learned in the Korean language. The first was how to order two drinks politely)

My friend just turned and stared at the guy, having been here long enough to understand their man-child games, when another dude kicked him in the back. Then both dudes started raining blows on them.

My friend, much larger than the two dudes, got up, dummied them both with single blows, looked around, saw himself surrounded by unfriendly faces, and ran for his life.

As the economy in Asia worsens, and the Korean media continues to paint foreigners as the soulless white devils upon whom all your misfortunes are to blame, life in Korea is going to degrade. When the Korean - US FTA fails, which it should, since it is disgustingly one sided for a trade deal, life here is going to get really shitty, really fast, if you're not asian.

This isn't the first time I've lived through this nonsense, it probably won't be the last. If you're living in Seoul, it's time to keep a battle buddy or two close by when you go out, again.

... because it gave them something to do

Read this story and consider this comment near the end

"We started working on it. It was something to do and we just kept at it. When we didn't get caught, we picked our night and just went."


It was something to do. They never thought they would get away with it, but they were so bored with prison life that they went for it anyway. The response of the Saskatchewan government? Build a new, more modern prison. If all it takes is something to do to keep prisoners, perhaps it will have an x-box or two.

X-box in prison? Is that correctional? Is it right to put people who cannot live within the

Serious Science for YOUR weekend

(courtesy of the BBC) The European Space Agency is launching it's Goce satellite to measure minute changes in the Earth's gravity.

Attesting to the sensitivity of the device:

""Imagine a snowflake, which has a fraction of a gram, slowly falling down on to the deck of a supertanker. The acceleration that the supertanker experiences from that snowflake is comparable to the sensitivity of our instrument," he told BBC News."


Enjoy the article here, especially the picture of what the shape of the Earth could really look like:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7935621.stm


article two for today is this one: a self sealing/repairing coating. Applications for this blow my mind apart. Imagine houses which heal themselves!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7939776.stm

This weeks top "crazy" science articles

Here's some "crazy" stuff happening in the world of science.

It's all MIND BLOWING fun!!!!!! Wa~Cha!!!!!

Our domination of the insect world continues:

http://www.technologyreview.com/computing/22039/?a=f

Excellent article on the future of robotic warfare, and questions which are not being asked:

http://harpers.org/archive/2009/01/hbc-90004275

Excellent article about the changing nature of the India - Pakistan / Pakistan - India conflict with great quotes like: "The India-Pakistan nuclear stand-off is stalemated to Pakistan’s advantage, in that they can launch (or allow) terror attacks such as the November 2008 one on Mumbai and India can do essentially nothing in response. The unmistakable smugness of the former Pakistani diplomat made this evident. However, this situation will not last forever."

http://www.thespacereview.com/article/1292/1


and this weeks brain quaking mind blower:

evidence that we may actually be existing inside a hologram:

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20126911.300-our-world-may-be-a-giant-hologram.html

Tai-won and back again

Well, I've been back for a week, the house is back in order, somewhat, and it's time to fill you all in.

Before we go, I want you to know that I'm purposely putting in a lot of spelling mistakes. I have future travel plans, and I don't want to spoil my chances for a tourist visa if I write something too nice about a politically sensitive topic. Paranoid you say? Perhaps, but when you have over a billion souls at your disposal and an economy slowing down, it's not too hard to find the money to pay someone a dollar a day, (literally, one US dollar for 24 hours of labour), to sit and surf the net looking for keywords.

Tai - won was great. Absolutely fabulous. Chinese New Year was awesome, and it's something anyone reading this should see for themselves. The winter weather was excellent. Many people seemed to think that it would be cold. When we left Seoul, the average noon temperature was about -2, and -15 at night. Tie- pay at the end of January was +20 at noon, and maybe +15 at night. By the time we got to the southern beaches at Ken ti ng, it was +28 and beyond. Lovely!

Due to the hectic packing of our apartment before we left for vacation, neither of us had time to do any language prep. All my books on travelling Asia were already packed, and the airport had no lonely planets, tour books, or anything on our destination. Eyes and ears open would be our only resources, plus whatever we could muster from our stressed out, overwrought souls.

Friday January 23

Flight from Seoul to Tie pa y on China airlines.
A fine airline, keen on recycling it's seats from some forgotten 1970's airline. Shelley was moderately comfortable, but my safety belt didn't come past my hips after I squeezed myself into the seat. I'm really not THAT big. Personally, I was more concerned with the frayed seat in front of me, well on it's way to freedom. I will give them this, they did deliver a decent vegetarian meal for Shelley.

Landing at the airport, we experienced our first culture shock: politeness.

After living in Korea for so long, we're quite used to people bumping into us. Actually, in Korea, we're used to people bumping into you, then grinding in an elbow so that they can edge ahead of you. So there we are, waiting for our luggage, and someone bumps me, and automatically apologizes in Chinese, then in English. Shocked and flabbargasted, we acquired our bags and made our way outside.

The sky was grey with clouds, and all the locals were wearing parka's and winter jackets. It was windy, and had a promise of rain, though it never got up the courage to do more than sprinkle. For me, it was +18 at least and I was ready to strip down to my T-shirt. We were directed into a taxi by a kindly gentlemen, (couldn't see a bus stop anywhere near), and we told him the name of our hotel.

He didn't know it.

We showed him the address, unfortunately written only in English, which I tried to read for him, but he still didn't get it.

At this point, in Korea, a taxi driver would stop the cab, and proceed to yell, whine, bitch and complain about foreigners not knowing anything and why we were wasting his time, so we gave him some money and hopped out of his cab and headed back towards the airport doors to try again. However, this wasn't Korea, and he pulled his cab over, and followed us to the doorman, and got the door man to read the hotel address for him, as he could read a little English.

There was no yelling, screaming, recrimination, hoopla, drama, or whining. For the first time in ages, it was just a taxi driver doing his job. Culture shock two. At this point, I knew I desperately needed a gin and tonic. In all my travels over the years, I've found that regardless of where you go, within the first hour of landing, sitting down and having a gin and tonic really, really helps with both climitization and culturization. Some people say beer is the way to go, but I prefer to use beer later, to get a handle on the local currency. A beer is a beer, and is roughly paid for the same way.

It turns out that the Landis was formerly the Ritz, which the driver learned when he pulled up. We all had a good laugh, Shelley and I checked in, we were given the location of the bar, and proceeded to relax.

Our two nights we had decided to splash down at the Landis hotel in downtown Tie- pay. http://taipei.landishotelsresorts.com/ 5Star for two nights was a bit pricey, but I promised someone a spa, and since we were splitting the cost, it wasn't too bad. Hotel service and decor was awesome, truly 5 star, but the spa didn't cut it and was not worth the cost. I've had better for much cheaper elsewhere. Also, the sauna and whirlpool were unavailable. Unavailable facilities does not get you a 5star price rating in my book. While this hotel was lovely, especially Rocco and Chu Zhi, the daytime doormen, it was not the best place we stayed at. That would come later.

Saturday January 24th

The breakfast buffet at the Landis filled us, we proceeded to the spa, followed by some RnR. That evening we set out on a mission to find a vegetarian restaurant. After two years in Korea, a country where when you tell people that you don't eat meat they answer with, "Uhh? Huh? Wha?????", Shelley was most interested in finding an actual vegetarian restaurant. This is her after seeing the menu:


Now that's happy. Here's some menu shots:


And the food was absolutely fabulous.

Above are the remains of the deep fried eggplant. Sorry we didn't get a picture before we totally devoured this dish, it smelt and tasted so good!
Above is a skillet of vegetarian "steak", and it was absolutely fabulous.

above is a picture of the vegetarian "fried chicken". Made from soy, it had an outer crust with the exact same texture as fried chicken and an inner "meatiness" that was the same as white chicken breast. The sauce was absolutely gorgeous. As you can see, we devoured this one too.





Sunday January 25

Checked out of the Landis and headed straight to the HSR train station. Despite warnings that we would face tremendous crowds of people travelling during the holiday, we decided to brave it, and barrel our way to the beaches of the south. We arrived at the station, and found it moderately empty. The HSR got us from the capital to the southern end of the Island in about an hour and a half. Average speed was 299 kph but it felt like we were doing 60, it was that smooth. After that came a few hours on a bus that dropped us off in Kenting, where we stayed for nine days.

Nine days you say? Oh yeah.




We rented a room above the strip and enjoyed nightly street fairs and fireworks. A great place to spend Chinese New Year. It never rained for more than 20 minutes. An incredible place to spend the end or January/beginning of February.

Traveling back to Tie Pay on our way out we followed the same path and arrived back in the capital to, unfortunately, the same grey skies as when we arrived. The weather did not dampen our spirits, however, as we stayed here:

"the grand hotel."

Don't let the name fool you, this hotel was nothing short of incredible. Although it is only rated as 4star, and prices are quite reasonable, the interior and the service was insane. Fabulous sauna facilities, (although segregated by sex), immense lobby, massive brunch buffet, impressive staff. It's located on a small mountain near one of the largest night markets. To have explored this hotel completely would have taken a day.

What hit us first about this place was the size:
(above is you know who in the lobby)

with hallways in which we wondered if we would be attacked by either a) hordes of screaming ninjas or b) an axe wielding Jack Nicholson.

There's a lot of pressure for me to get this post out, I haven't finished, and I'm busy as hell right now, so I'm going to post this, incomplete as it is, and hope that I have time soon to finish the rest. Trust me, there's much more to come.

quick note

Just a quick note to let everyone know that Shelley and I made it back safe and sound to South Korea.

All is well and fine, so far. We have spent a full day unpacking all out boxes.

The bathroom has been refinished, as well as the kitchen, more to come on this.

Internet is intermittent here as I am busy re-connecting cables and computers and oh man it's gonna be a while as I'm stuck looking for ONE little power cable that's hiding somewhere, in all this mess..... grr.

Rock N' Roll!!!!

On the Road.....

Heading to Taiwan for two weeks of vacation with the Lady. Two weeks of much needed vacation out of Korea.

For the first time in my life I'm going to experience Chinese New Year traditional style. Or maybe Neo traditional style. Or ....... I don't know. I'm not expecting anything from this trip except adventure and good times, adventure because I've never been to this place before, and good times because that's what I bring.

However, I expect great things from the Landis hotel in Taipei,

http://taipei.landishotelsresorts.com/

And some sweet beaches.

Rock and Roll!

However,

while we are away, my landlord is going to destroy my apartment. See, I live in a three story building. I live on the top floor, a family of Koreans on the middle floor, and the landlord in the bottom. There's a leak in between my floor and the middle apartment. Well, they say it's a leak. The truth of the matter is that there is and never has been any grouting in my bathroom. This building is 20 years old. Anyone who has ever done bathroom work can tell you the math on this madness. There's a giant puddle of rot water inbetween the floors, leaking through the concrete, and messing up the entire building.

Add to this that Korean's don't build buildings to last more than 20 years, and are notorious for cutting corners and using substandard materials, well..... I think you're seeing the picture. So, in addition to getting ready to go on vacation, I've also been, well, packing. Almost as if to move. They are going to come in here tomorrow and smash up all the floors, rip out the plumbing, rip out the bathroom, put in new pipes, new plumbing, new bathroom, and supposedly new kitchen.

Meanwhile, all my belongings will be under the care of people notorious for not giving a damn about other peoples belongings, property, or well being.

Disaster on the horizon? Oh yeah. So tonight I'll be breaking down my computers, packing up my monitors, and hoping that everything will be ok.


Yay.

Stress? You bet. Worst case scenario I'll be coming back from a beach vacation to no home in the middle of February with all my worldly possessions strewn about the street. Although I have no back up plan for this scenario, I am prepared.

fear thee not gentle reader! It's not plan X. It's plan T.

Rock n' Roll!!!!!!!!!!!

Slim

this was a post I originally wrote in March of 2005. The actual encounter I describe is from New Years Eve just over three months previous.

Re-rereading it, and given the time of year, I decided that this would be the first of the flashback posts. In retrospect, I don't think the original post did enough to honour the sacrifice of life, limb and self gifted to us by the men and women of the armed forces of all countries. It was, however, a very real conversation. I will never forget the anger and pain of the moment. I think of slim every so often. I have never run into him again. I do hope that he is well, his family safe and growing.

March 25, 2005

His name was Slim, or at least that's what I'll call him. He was anything but slim, built more like a cargo truck.

I met Slim on New Years Eve in a back water town in South Korea. We were both travelling through, and had no real connections. I was there to visit friends for the occasion, he was being recycled out of one of this years war zones. Slim was drunk out of his mind and said far more than he should have. Slim was a sniper in the US army. Slim had lost his entire team on his last mission before he came into Korea. They were reduced to names that he kept repeating, over and over again in between bouts of rage and anger. Slim had trained every member of his squad. Although he wasn't in command, he had led them into combat for more than a year. Slim has a wife and daughter back home in one of the dirtier parts of the United States. He showed me their pics, and they're both beautiful. Slim told me about the conditions they were living in, and how his salary barely kept them afloat.

Slim showed me where the army had pulled a chunk of shrapnel out of his arm that left about twenty inches of scar and twisted the muscle all around the bone. He got that at the same time as he'd lost the last kid he'd trained. He told me what the kid said as he bled out in his arms. That's pretty fucked up. Slim had pulled the trigger on a young girl. He couldn't tell me her age, but he figured she was just about to turn into a teen. He'd counted her missing teeth through the scope on his rifle. Believe it or not, she was considered a combatant in that place she had lived in. Slim was ordered to do his job, and could not lawfully disobey. Could not lawfully disobey.

Slim kept telling me that in every real sense, the best thing he could do for his family back home was to die in combat. He said it again and again. He had worked out all the math of how much they would benefit financialy from his death. I think that's the most messed up part of all. Slim was not a bad guy. I hope he makes it home, and I hope he remembered what I said to him. He was damn drunk. I'm sure he'll remember not to drink soju again.

As you read this, hundreds of GI's are being cycled out of combat zones and into bases across Korea, Japan, and the Philipines. They get a month, maybe two, and then they get sent back. Some lucky ones get to go home. For the most part, the locals get to enjoy the company of these strung out, stressed out time bombs as they do whatever they can, wherever they are, to try and relax, forget, have a slice of normal, before training up and shipping out for the next tour. For the ones I've met, they're not stupid, barbarous idiots. They are conditioned, killing machines. They are far from home, they don't understand where they are, and they are frightened. They are too young to be doing this, and I understand now what the older soldiers mean when they say they always are. Even though they are starting to understand the breadth and scope of the propaganda they've had layered on their heads since they first memorized the pledge of allegiance, they've got nothing else yet, and easily fall back on the familiar patterns of their lives before they left America.



that was all I wrote then. It was a little close to the heart, even three months later. Here we are, four years later, we're still at war, the young ones are still heading in, the wheel keeps on turning. I pray you and your family are well Slim.